When I was a kid, especially during my teen years, I used to routinely dream about things that would later come to pass. Sometimes, I'd even have what I thought were waking dreams, where I'd suddenly know something that I had no way of explaining how I knew it. Usually, it was about relatively insignificant things, such as knowing we were going to have a surprise quiz in math, or conversations I would later find myself having with teachers or other students.
As I got older, this ability seemed to naturally fade, especially since I didn't go out of my way to encourage these dreams and thoughts. I thought they were interesting, but rather creepy, and I was mostly glad when they completely stopped.
This morning, I realized that this ability hasn't completely gone away. I experienced a rather strange incident of work-related precognition.
First, a little background to the story:
About five years ago, we worked for a client who never paid us for a $14,000 project. We sent him to a collection agency, and when that was unsuccessful, we sued him the following year. He failed to appear, and we won a default judgment against him. As soon as the judgment was granted, he filed for bankruptcy, and that put an end to our ability to collect. Although legally the guy doesn't owe us the money, and we have forgiven him in the sense that we no longer actively harbor any animosity towards him, we haven't forgotten how he treated us. We haven't forgotten the hardships we endured as a result of not getting paid, and how it felt when we were days away from not being able to pay our mortgage on time. We went through several months of really scary, hungry and lean times, not only because we didn't get paid, but also because we had turned down other jobs because we were busy working for this client.
Since all of this unfolded several years ago, it's rare I give our former client even so much as a passing thought. He lives in another city, our paths never intersect, and I generally don't have any cause to think about him. He's no longer part of my world.
So it struck me as odd, when two days ago I had a dream about him. In the dream, he had called us up, wanting to know if we were willing to work on another project. I chalked it up as just random firings of an over-tired and over-stressed brain. With all this court stuff that's been going on with respect to our child custody case, I figured I might dream just about anything.
Well this morning, the most unbelievable thing happened. About an hour ago, the phone rang. It was our former client, calling to let us know that he was, "rebuilding his office," and had a project for us to work on.
When FosterEema told me who was on the phone, I couldn't believe it, and I simply couldn't contain myself. "He owes us $14,000 and he wants us to come back to work for him?" I exclaimed, loudly.
Needless to say, FosterEema told the client we weren't interested and ended the call.
Unbelievable.
I just can't decide which is more amazing -- the fact that I predicted the client's call, or the fact that the client had the chutzpah to call us and ask us to work after ripping us off for so much money.
Of course this guy does have a lot of gall. This isn't the first time he's called us to ask us to work. Shortly before we ended up in court, he asked us if we could help him set up a pornographic Web site so that he would have a revenue stream from which he would be able to pay us. Needless to say, we turned that project down, too.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Why Self Employment?
I've had a number of people ask me recently, in connection with all our adoption troubles and worries, why not just "get a job" that would offer all our family members health insurance and be done with it.
The truth is, it's not that easy.
Being a queer couple, we run into the issue that not all companies who offer health insurance offer coverage to unmarried couples. If we shut down our business (which guarantees coverage to both of us) and got "real" jobs, we might find ourselves in the ugly position of one of us having health coverage but leaving the other uncovered.
But it's more than just the question of health coverage. It's much more than that.
When I was in college, my father always advised that I should take a decent job with a good company as soon as I graduated and plan to stay there. "You'll advance if you remain long-term with a company," he told me. Certainly, that advice has worked well for him. He worked for one company long enough to earn a good retirement, he went back to work for them as a temporary hire, and eventually left to work for another company, from which he has retired again. Although he's had a number of temporary and consulting gigs over the years, if you were to look at the jobs he held after he finished school, they would mostly span decades.
Sadly, the working world doesn't often offer the job stability that was afforded my father. In the nearly 20 years of my career, not counting consulting and temporary work, I have have been employed with at least seven different companies, and I have made two attempts at running my own business. The longest stretch of employment, not counting my current stretch of self-employment, lasted roughly three years. I quit my first, and third jobs because I was working under abusive working conditions. I preemptively quit my fifth job because my unreasonable and abusive boss told me she planned to lay me off. I was laid off from my second, fourth, sixth and seventh jobs because of company cut-backs. Of that group, two of the businesses completely folded. My first attempt at self-employment was between jobs five and six; it failed. My current attempt, after job seven, has been a going concern for seven years.
When you consider that I held my last job seven years ago, it's pretty alarming to think how many times I've changed jobs over the years. The longest I managed to stay at a company was three years, the shortest was just under a year. On average, most of my jobs lasted under two years.
That's not a very good track record, is it?
Now keep in mind that there is a lot of turnover in the Information Technology industry. It's quite common (and sometimes even encouraged) for tech workers to move on after a relatively short period of time at a job. In my case, I quit abusive jobs only when I reached the point I felt I had no other options, and was laid off from quite a few good jobs due to company cutbacks.
In the last 18 months I was employed, both me and my partner were laid off twice.
We realized that we couldn't continue to live under such uncertainty, especially when every job loss meant a month or longer without income until a new position could be found. What finally sounded the death knell for regular employment was the pattern I noticed. In every case where I was laid off, I had been told I was doing a great job, that people were happy with my work, and everything was fine. I was promised raises, vacations, and all sorts of perks if only I could work a little "extra" to complete a project. In almost every case, as soon as the project was complete, I found myself handed my walking papers.
I worked overtime out of a sense of company loyalty. If I could just get the project over the hump, there would be rewards on the other side. In almost every case, I found out that the layoffs had been planned for weeks (or even months) and that managers were dangling carrots to get people to work extra hours so they could be laid off with nothing unfinished on their desks.
In short, the managers knew that their companies were in trouble. They lied.
Now I can't say that I entirely blame the managers. After all, it wouldn't be in their best interest to tell the truth. If the truth got out, employees would be leaving like rats jumping off a sinking ship, and nobody would be left to finish uncompleted projects.
The reason we started our own business was simple: we were tired of being taken advantage of by our employers. We were tired of putting all our financial eggs in one basket, only to be either abused to the point of needing to quit for our own sanity, or being laid off after making super-human efforts to get projects done quickly. We were tired of the lies, of the broken promises, and the stress created by having to search for a new job every couple of years.
Now I won't lie, being self-employed is stressful, too. However, it's stressful in a different way. When you are self-employed, you know exactly how much work is on the table, how much money is coming in, and how much money is going out. You know that if work is slow, you'd better hustle. You also know that if work is too busy, clients are going to get mad. Both of those conditions are stressful, but they are offset by one key point: you know what's on the table.
When you work for someone else, you have very little transparency into the inner workings of the company, so when you do lose your job, it often comes as a big surprise. You have a false sense of security, knowing your paycheck will arrive on the first and the fifteenth, but your world is shattered when that abruptly ends. With the exception of one company, every time I've been laid off, it's been immediate. Each time, things were going well (so I thought), I was called into the boss' office, given my walking papers and 15 minutes to gather my things and leave.
There are a lot of things I don't like about self-employment. I don't like the crazy hours, the unpredictability, and the cost of health insurance. What I do like is the fact that I can generally see further into the future than my next paycheck. It doesn't always mean I like what I see, but at least I have a better idea than I would if I was sitting in a corporate cubicle somewhere.
FosterEema once worked at a job where the only way you knew if you were still employed by the company was whether or not your company ID opened the magnetic lock on the door when you arrived at work. I can't imagine living my life that way, and that is why we decided to create our own jobs.
Our desire to be self-employed goes beyond the financial and emotional issues of working a regular nine-to-five job. We've realized, as self-employed people, we have freedom that other workers do not. We can homeschool our daughter during the working day. If things are slow, we can take a two or a three hour lunch. If we want, we can take work outside, or even camping if the campground has wireless Internet available. We can say no to clients, jobs or projects we don't want to do. We can make decisions about our lives, our work, and our clients that no regular employee can make. Our financial eggs are spread across multiple projects, jobs and clients, so if one turns bad, we have the option of walking away.
Yes, there are a lot of difficulties with being self-employed. At least this way, we have a better chance of making our own destiny, rather than having it thrust upon us.
The truth is, it's not that easy.
Being a queer couple, we run into the issue that not all companies who offer health insurance offer coverage to unmarried couples. If we shut down our business (which guarantees coverage to both of us) and got "real" jobs, we might find ourselves in the ugly position of one of us having health coverage but leaving the other uncovered.
But it's more than just the question of health coverage. It's much more than that.
When I was in college, my father always advised that I should take a decent job with a good company as soon as I graduated and plan to stay there. "You'll advance if you remain long-term with a company," he told me. Certainly, that advice has worked well for him. He worked for one company long enough to earn a good retirement, he went back to work for them as a temporary hire, and eventually left to work for another company, from which he has retired again. Although he's had a number of temporary and consulting gigs over the years, if you were to look at the jobs he held after he finished school, they would mostly span decades.
Sadly, the working world doesn't often offer the job stability that was afforded my father. In the nearly 20 years of my career, not counting consulting and temporary work, I have have been employed with at least seven different companies, and I have made two attempts at running my own business. The longest stretch of employment, not counting my current stretch of self-employment, lasted roughly three years. I quit my first, and third jobs because I was working under abusive working conditions. I preemptively quit my fifth job because my unreasonable and abusive boss told me she planned to lay me off. I was laid off from my second, fourth, sixth and seventh jobs because of company cut-backs. Of that group, two of the businesses completely folded. My first attempt at self-employment was between jobs five and six; it failed. My current attempt, after job seven, has been a going concern for seven years.
When you consider that I held my last job seven years ago, it's pretty alarming to think how many times I've changed jobs over the years. The longest I managed to stay at a company was three years, the shortest was just under a year. On average, most of my jobs lasted under two years.
That's not a very good track record, is it?
Now keep in mind that there is a lot of turnover in the Information Technology industry. It's quite common (and sometimes even encouraged) for tech workers to move on after a relatively short period of time at a job. In my case, I quit abusive jobs only when I reached the point I felt I had no other options, and was laid off from quite a few good jobs due to company cutbacks.
In the last 18 months I was employed, both me and my partner were laid off twice.
We realized that we couldn't continue to live under such uncertainty, especially when every job loss meant a month or longer without income until a new position could be found. What finally sounded the death knell for regular employment was the pattern I noticed. In every case where I was laid off, I had been told I was doing a great job, that people were happy with my work, and everything was fine. I was promised raises, vacations, and all sorts of perks if only I could work a little "extra" to complete a project. In almost every case, as soon as the project was complete, I found myself handed my walking papers.
I worked overtime out of a sense of company loyalty. If I could just get the project over the hump, there would be rewards on the other side. In almost every case, I found out that the layoffs had been planned for weeks (or even months) and that managers were dangling carrots to get people to work extra hours so they could be laid off with nothing unfinished on their desks.
In short, the managers knew that their companies were in trouble. They lied.
Now I can't say that I entirely blame the managers. After all, it wouldn't be in their best interest to tell the truth. If the truth got out, employees would be leaving like rats jumping off a sinking ship, and nobody would be left to finish uncompleted projects.
The reason we started our own business was simple: we were tired of being taken advantage of by our employers. We were tired of putting all our financial eggs in one basket, only to be either abused to the point of needing to quit for our own sanity, or being laid off after making super-human efforts to get projects done quickly. We were tired of the lies, of the broken promises, and the stress created by having to search for a new job every couple of years.
Now I won't lie, being self-employed is stressful, too. However, it's stressful in a different way. When you are self-employed, you know exactly how much work is on the table, how much money is coming in, and how much money is going out. You know that if work is slow, you'd better hustle. You also know that if work is too busy, clients are going to get mad. Both of those conditions are stressful, but they are offset by one key point: you know what's on the table.
When you work for someone else, you have very little transparency into the inner workings of the company, so when you do lose your job, it often comes as a big surprise. You have a false sense of security, knowing your paycheck will arrive on the first and the fifteenth, but your world is shattered when that abruptly ends. With the exception of one company, every time I've been laid off, it's been immediate. Each time, things were going well (so I thought), I was called into the boss' office, given my walking papers and 15 minutes to gather my things and leave.
There are a lot of things I don't like about self-employment. I don't like the crazy hours, the unpredictability, and the cost of health insurance. What I do like is the fact that I can generally see further into the future than my next paycheck. It doesn't always mean I like what I see, but at least I have a better idea than I would if I was sitting in a corporate cubicle somewhere.
FosterEema once worked at a job where the only way you knew if you were still employed by the company was whether or not your company ID opened the magnetic lock on the door when you arrived at work. I can't imagine living my life that way, and that is why we decided to create our own jobs.
Our desire to be self-employed goes beyond the financial and emotional issues of working a regular nine-to-five job. We've realized, as self-employed people, we have freedom that other workers do not. We can homeschool our daughter during the working day. If things are slow, we can take a two or a three hour lunch. If we want, we can take work outside, or even camping if the campground has wireless Internet available. We can say no to clients, jobs or projects we don't want to do. We can make decisions about our lives, our work, and our clients that no regular employee can make. Our financial eggs are spread across multiple projects, jobs and clients, so if one turns bad, we have the option of walking away.
Yes, there are a lot of difficulties with being self-employed. At least this way, we have a better chance of making our own destiny, rather than having it thrust upon us.
Friday, October 26, 2007
Massive Overtime
One of the nice things about being self-employed is that you get to set your own schedule.
One the not-so-nice things about being self-employed is that, sometimes, your schedule sets you.
This week has marked the official start of crunch time at work. I finally got some information I'd been waiting on for five months, and now the race is on. My job: to complete an impossibly-sized pile of work between now and the end of the year.
This was a project I'd been discussing with our client since June.
In June, I told him that I needed the information soon so I would have enough time to complete the job.
In July, I told him that we were starting to run out of time, but I thought I could finish if I hurried.
In August, I was getting nervous. "Please send me the information," I said.
By September, I was in full-out panic. I even yelled at my client. "If you want this work done by the end of the year, you have to get me the stuff, now!"
Every time I asked, my client said he would bring it up with his client, and they would give him some more excuses about why they didn't have it ready.
I got the stuff I needed a week ago today. I have two months to complete work I thought would realistically take six. Yesterday, my client and I had one of those unpleasant "come to Jesus" discussions where I told him that there was no way I could get all the work done that he expected by the end of the year.
It was not a pretty conversation. Apparently, my client had sold his customer on the new as-yet-unbuilt system, and now large dollars are at stake. "It doesn't matter that it took the customer five months to get us the information you needed to get started, the project still has to be finished on time. Our customer will just tell us, 'just hire more people, we are paying you good money to have this done by the end of the year.'"
Well, that's all well and good, but we aren't being paid enough to hire another body for two months. Even if we were, we would run into learning curve issues. The system is big and complex, and it would take several weeks for another person to ramp up on it. But, more importantly, there another factor that plays very heavily:
You cannot task nine women with one month of pregnancy and expect a child as a result.
There are some things that just can't be finished more quickly, no matter how many people you throw at the problem.
I worked 56 hours this week and I feel as if I haven't even made the smallest dent. I guess I'll have to work even more next week.
One the not-so-nice things about being self-employed is that, sometimes, your schedule sets you.
This week has marked the official start of crunch time at work. I finally got some information I'd been waiting on for five months, and now the race is on. My job: to complete an impossibly-sized pile of work between now and the end of the year.
This was a project I'd been discussing with our client since June.
In June, I told him that I needed the information soon so I would have enough time to complete the job.
In July, I told him that we were starting to run out of time, but I thought I could finish if I hurried.
In August, I was getting nervous. "Please send me the information," I said.
By September, I was in full-out panic. I even yelled at my client. "If you want this work done by the end of the year, you have to get me the stuff, now!"
Every time I asked, my client said he would bring it up with his client, and they would give him some more excuses about why they didn't have it ready.
I got the stuff I needed a week ago today. I have two months to complete work I thought would realistically take six. Yesterday, my client and I had one of those unpleasant "come to Jesus" discussions where I told him that there was no way I could get all the work done that he expected by the end of the year.
It was not a pretty conversation. Apparently, my client had sold his customer on the new as-yet-unbuilt system, and now large dollars are at stake. "It doesn't matter that it took the customer five months to get us the information you needed to get started, the project still has to be finished on time. Our customer will just tell us, 'just hire more people, we are paying you good money to have this done by the end of the year.'"
Well, that's all well and good, but we aren't being paid enough to hire another body for two months. Even if we were, we would run into learning curve issues. The system is big and complex, and it would take several weeks for another person to ramp up on it. But, more importantly, there another factor that plays very heavily:
You cannot task nine women with one month of pregnancy and expect a child as a result.
There are some things that just can't be finished more quickly, no matter how many people you throw at the problem.
I worked 56 hours this week and I feel as if I haven't even made the smallest dent. I guess I'll have to work even more next week.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Another Late Payment
One of our biggest clients did not pay his September invoice on time, so we are rolling into the beginning of October with about half of our usual household income. This is not the first time this has happened. The last time we had payment problems with this client we were able resolve things quickly, but it's exhausting and stressful having to call again, again and again to find out what happened to our check.
This is not the only client with whom we are having payment problems. One of our newer clients is showing a propensity for slow pay as well. We had trouble getting our first invoice paid in a timely fashion, and they haven't paid the invoice for the work we did in August yet. I suspect the invoice will get paid just as soon as they ask for their next round of work and I tell them that I can't start it until their outstanding invoices are paid.
I just love playing hardball with clients. Not!
I feel like I have to walk a very delicate balance with slow-paying clients. I have to stay professional and friendly, when I really feel like blowing my cork and saying something nasty like pay your f*cking bill already! I have to be polite, yet firm, and remind them of the terms of our contract.
But it's really hard not to come unhinged when you are expecting a check, it doesn't arrive, but your bills show up on time expecting to be paid.
This is not the only client with whom we are having payment problems. One of our newer clients is showing a propensity for slow pay as well. We had trouble getting our first invoice paid in a timely fashion, and they haven't paid the invoice for the work we did in August yet. I suspect the invoice will get paid just as soon as they ask for their next round of work and I tell them that I can't start it until their outstanding invoices are paid.
I just love playing hardball with clients. Not!
I feel like I have to walk a very delicate balance with slow-paying clients. I have to stay professional and friendly, when I really feel like blowing my cork and saying something nasty like pay your f*cking bill already! I have to be polite, yet firm, and remind them of the terms of our contract.
But it's really hard not to come unhinged when you are expecting a check, it doesn't arrive, but your bills show up on time expecting to be paid.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Crunch Time
October through December is typically the "crunch time" with our work. Clients have end-of-the year reporting and projects that just have to get time, and it's usually the time of year where I find myself working 60, 70 and sometimes even 80 hours a week.
I'm really not looking forward to it this year, because I know that our daughter "Danielle" is going to whine about it.
As it is, we often hear the complaint, "you are always working." She gets angry when she's finished with school and we are still sitting at our desks doing work-related tasks. Although I realize that she has the disadvantage of being an only child, I can't stop working to be her personal entertainment system. As it is, FosterEema and I end up interrupting our day quite a lot to help her finish her required school assignments.
It's a tough thing, and "Danielle" is still at the age where she thinks that the world revolves solely around her.
The other day, I was speaking to a client on the phone. "Danielle" kept trying to interrupt, and it was getting frustrating. Finally, I had to put the client on hold, and I told her, not very nicely, to go away until I was finished with my telephone call. She slunk off, muttering something about the unfairness of it all.
Life is not fair. If it were, I'd be one of the rich folks with a big investment account and nothing to do all day but indulge her.
Sadly, my life isn't that way, so I need to spend a certain amount of time in front of my computer. I have a feeling it's going to be a long three months.
I'm really not looking forward to it this year, because I know that our daughter "Danielle" is going to whine about it.
As it is, we often hear the complaint, "you are always working." She gets angry when she's finished with school and we are still sitting at our desks doing work-related tasks. Although I realize that she has the disadvantage of being an only child, I can't stop working to be her personal entertainment system. As it is, FosterEema and I end up interrupting our day quite a lot to help her finish her required school assignments.
It's a tough thing, and "Danielle" is still at the age where she thinks that the world revolves solely around her.
The other day, I was speaking to a client on the phone. "Danielle" kept trying to interrupt, and it was getting frustrating. Finally, I had to put the client on hold, and I told her, not very nicely, to go away until I was finished with my telephone call. She slunk off, muttering something about the unfairness of it all.
Life is not fair. If it were, I'd be one of the rich folks with a big investment account and nothing to do all day but indulge her.
Sadly, my life isn't that way, so I need to spend a certain amount of time in front of my computer. I have a feeling it's going to be a long three months.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Buggin' Folks for Money
Collections has to be one of my least-favorite activities when it comes to running my business. I don't particularly like tracking down timer files to put together my invoices, I don't like printing them out (or e-mailing them) but what I hate most of all is having to bug people when their checks don't arrive on time.
Recently, we took on a new client. I really didn't want to take them on at all, because I figured their job would turn into an ongoing pain in the rear. I thought I'd scare them off by quoting them a high rate, but they didn't bat an eye and signed a contract with us anyway.
Okay, great. I don't mind doing pain-in-the-ass work for lots of money.
Every time I get frustrated with their antics, I take a deep breath, and remind myself, "I'm getting paid oodles of money to put up with their bullsh*t," and then it doesn't seem quite so bad.
Their piddly, pain-in-the-ass job has earned me almost $800 so far.
To make the deal sweeter, I decided to write our contract so that invoices were due on receipt, rather than giving these folks less stringent terms of Net 30. We used to invoice all our clients Net 30, but after being stiffed several times, we've shortened our bill cycle considerably. This helps our cash flow, and gives clients less time to plan their escape if they are going to weasel out on a bill.
Today, I happened to notice that our invoice to the new client was 24 days old. I figured 24 days was more than plenty of time to pay a "due on receipt" invoice, so I sent her an e-mail. She forwarded my e-mail to their accounts payable guy, who e-mailed me back to say that our invoice had been "misfiled," and a check was in the mail.
I e-mailed back a thank-you, and the account payable guy admitted he'd shuffled our invoice in with some notes from a meeting. If I hadn't have asked about it, who knows when we would have been paid.
I hate asking for money. But I really hate not getting paid.
Recently, we took on a new client. I really didn't want to take them on at all, because I figured their job would turn into an ongoing pain in the rear. I thought I'd scare them off by quoting them a high rate, but they didn't bat an eye and signed a contract with us anyway.
Okay, great. I don't mind doing pain-in-the-ass work for lots of money.
Every time I get frustrated with their antics, I take a deep breath, and remind myself, "I'm getting paid oodles of money to put up with their bullsh*t," and then it doesn't seem quite so bad.
Their piddly, pain-in-the-ass job has earned me almost $800 so far.
To make the deal sweeter, I decided to write our contract so that invoices were due on receipt, rather than giving these folks less stringent terms of Net 30. We used to invoice all our clients Net 30, but after being stiffed several times, we've shortened our bill cycle considerably. This helps our cash flow, and gives clients less time to plan their escape if they are going to weasel out on a bill.
Today, I happened to notice that our invoice to the new client was 24 days old. I figured 24 days was more than plenty of time to pay a "due on receipt" invoice, so I sent her an e-mail. She forwarded my e-mail to their accounts payable guy, who e-mailed me back to say that our invoice had been "misfiled," and a check was in the mail.
I e-mailed back a thank-you, and the account payable guy admitted he'd shuffled our invoice in with some notes from a meeting. If I hadn't have asked about it, who knows when we would have been paid.
I hate asking for money. But I really hate not getting paid.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Laziness, The Bane of Self-Employment
One of the good things about self-employment is that you can, within reason, set your own hours and work schedules. It's mostly a good thing, because it allows us to do things like home school our daughter, run errands when we need to, and take a day off now and again.
The bad thing about self-employment is that you can, within reason, set your own hours and work schedules.
Why is this bad? Because right now I feel really lazy and I don't want to work.
Laziness can be the bane of self-employment, because there's nothing threatening you with a stick if you don't get your work done. Sure, clients can see when things aren't finished on time if you miss a deadline, but sometimes being lazy means that you goof around for a few days and then have to hustle like hell to make up for the goof-off time.
I am so lazy, unmotivated, and slothful, that I've been trying to come up with any excuse not to do any productive work.
Well I did do 45 minutes of productive work this morning. That's a good effort for the day, right?
Right?
The bad thing about self-employment is that you can, within reason, set your own hours and work schedules.
Why is this bad? Because right now I feel really lazy and I don't want to work.
Laziness can be the bane of self-employment, because there's nothing threatening you with a stick if you don't get your work done. Sure, clients can see when things aren't finished on time if you miss a deadline, but sometimes being lazy means that you goof around for a few days and then have to hustle like hell to make up for the goof-off time.
I am so lazy, unmotivated, and slothful, that I've been trying to come up with any excuse not to do any productive work.
Well I did do 45 minutes of productive work this morning. That's a good effort for the day, right?
Right?
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